Sit and Watch
by Commander Fiction
Summary: (Writing Prompts) Leonard McCoy deals with his deepest fear when the mission goes everything but routine, leaving he and Jim in a dire situation, and has to come to terms with the fact sometimes all he can do is sit and watch. Jim&Bones pairing. Accepting suggestions.
1. Chapter 1

**Sit and Watch**

Adrenaline rushes through his veins. The tropical colors of the forest blur together as he sprints, leaps, and dodges his way to the one and only person that can get his heart to drop, explode, and fall to pieces with one single word.

"Bones."

It was supposed to be routine. It was supposed to be safe. It was supposed to be okay. It wasn't supposed to happen. What had started as fine, ended disastrous when a storm blew in, disrupting the signal to the Enterprise, leaving them utterly stranded on a planet that will more than likely swallow them whole and spit their ashes out, and that's if they have any luck.

He pauses briefly to catch his breath, but the one word over that had been whispered mere seconds before the impact of gushing water kept him going.

The storm had brought a waterslide down the mountains; unfortunately the waves took them both out, and had left them separated. He can only hope the blond idiot isn't dead. But with any luck, he'll just be gravely injured and on the brink of death and he'll have to jump headfirst into whatever is possible to slam the door shut in Death's face and pull Jim away from the darkness.

Leonard's heart finally stops when he hears his name called weakly from behind.

Turning around, his breath catches his throat and the thump in his chest drowns his ears. Jim's slumped sluggishly against a tree, face paler than snow, lips as blue as his eyes. His overall appearance is lethargic and lacking the usual energy bouncing within.

He swallows, taking a moment to force a breath into his lungs before darting to his best friend's side, assessing the immediate damage.

"Damn it Jim, goddamn it." He mutters mostly to himself as he eases Jim to the ground, the kid's clothes still wet and soggy from being swept away in the flood.

Jim tries for one of those glamorous smiles, but it ends in a nasty wet cough.

Leonard brushes the blond hairs back, "Hold still Jim, you're going to be okay, I'm just gonna take a look okay?"

His captain nods sternly, but the pain is evidently etched on his face.

Slowly, Leonard peels the golden uniform up, holding in a sudden gasp. It's bad, it's terrible, it's unfixable, not here.

Jim's ribs are all misaligned, his right lung has bruising incasing all around and he can only assume it's been punctured. The kid has minutes to live, tops.

The blond coughs again, blood surging from his mouth, causing him to choke.

Eyes widening, Leonard rolls Jim onto his side, watching as the thick crimson blood splutters from Jim's icy blue lips. It's then he notices the raspy breathing, the hitches in the blond's wheezes.

"You're okay Jim, I'm gonna get us outta of here." Leonard declares, nodding his head, but Jim's eyes only gaze up at him pitifully.

How does he know?

"Bones…" Jim whispers his name.

Leonard shakes his head, "Jim do you have your communicator? I lost mine, but there's still time, we can contact the ship and I'll get you in sickbay. I know you hate the place but it'll only take a couple days to get you back to normal. Please Jim just hang on, I can handle this-"

"Bones, please." Jim pleads with him, grabbing his hands.

Leonard hadn't realized his surgeon hands had started shaking, until Jim's own shivering hands grasped his. He stares down at Jim's hands; they're so strong, so firm, and experienced.

"Not this time."

The words that leave Jim's mouth are unreal. This isn't how it's supposed to end, their supposed to die together, back to back and because of Jim's own stupidity, not because of some storm. This isn't how it ends; this is not how James Tiberius Kirk dies.

"No Jim, you listen to me, you're not dying on this planet. We have time, plenty of time, it's not that bad Jim, you're going to pull through, trust me." Even Leonard doesn't believe his own words, they're just useless filler, avoiding the inevitable.

"Bones, please. I-I, I don't want to die alone."

Tears slip down Jim's cheeks, he's asking Leonard to do something he'd never thought he'd have to do.

"No." Leonard chokes out, shaking his head wildly, "Stop being absurd, you're not dying here. You hear me? You're not dying here!"

Jim would've flinched if he weren't so damn exhausted.

"You can't die Jim, I can't be alone."

Leonard then realizes how selfish he is being. Jim's on Death's doorstep and he's going to let him do it alone all because he can't come to terms with the fact Jim is dying.

"I'm sorry Bones-I really am." Jim's sobs begin to shake his body, causing more pain to ignite in his abdomen.

Seeing this, Leonard collapses beside Jim, and finally doing what Jim wanted him to do in the first place, he holds him. He brings Jim against his chest, stroking his hair as he sobs and mumbles his pathetic apologies.

"For god's sake man, don't die saying sorry to me; you've earned that much, even though you are a pain in the ass." Leonard grumbles half-heartedly, but nonetheless makes Jim stop crying and actually chuckle.

He sighs, looking up at the sky, and there she is. Through the wisps of gray storm clouds she glistens in the sky. They must've come down lower to use the ship's scanners to search for them.

"Hey, Jim, see her up there?"

"Where?" Jim asks hoarsely, consciousness leaving his exerted body.

Leonard directs Jim's gaze with a pointed finger, "Right there, there's your girl."

His captain smiles happily up at the Enterprise, "She's pretty right?"

He smirks down at Jim, "She's the most beautiful girl out there. You've done good Jim."

The blond nods slowly, satisfied with the answer.

Leonard glances up, watching the Enterprise in her search for them, and within the next moment, he glances down at Jim, whose life has slipped through his hands. His captain's body is heavy against his and it's then that his nickname has become a reality. He's just bones.

He longs to call Jim's name, to shake him awake, to do anything but simply watch, but in the end it's all he can do, sit and watch.

Realization of Jim's death settles within him, causing him to jolt and burst into a world of darkness. Pants escape his mouth and the bed sheets pool around his lap. Its then he comes to the bittersweet conclusion that the whole damn thing is a dream.

His lips quiver and his head falls into his hands as he begins to sobs helplessly, Jim's lifeless eyes staring at him. It was all just too real. Leonard tries to calm himself, but he's left sniffling for nearly a half hour.

"Pull yourself together damn it." Leonard growls to himself, rubbing his weary face with both hands.

Still, he can't shake Jim's very vivid death, and can't help but wonder, did it happen?

He keeps telling himself that Jim's alive and well, but the ache in his heart won't let him sleep, so instead, he climbs out of bed and slips on a pair of sweats before leaving the privacy of his quarters.

Rather quickly he makes it to Jim's room, opening and closing the door after himself. His heart begins to pound within his chest and for a moment the bed looks vacant, but then the sight of blond hair poking out beneath the massive blanket catches his eye. Jim's curled up on the edge of the bed, sleeping peacefully in silence, not so much as a snore coming from him.

Leonard breathes a sigh.

Even though there's relief surging through his body at the sight of Jim alive and well, he still can't block Jim's death from his mind. So instead, he pulls up Jim's desk chair and plops down, after all, the only thing he can do at the end of the day is sit and watch.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sit and Watch**

 **(A little continuation since now this will be my writer's block story, and currently I'm hitting a writer's block, I will also be taking in writing prompts and posting them here so feel free to send me anything)**

"No."

His eyes pull back open, unsure if he had just heard a word uttered into the darkness. But only silence follows, so he lets his eyes droop closed once more. Leonard's mind begins to submerge into the black bliss of sleep, exhaustion from his vigil finally taking its toll.

"N-No."

Eyes snap back open, and he blinks. He swears he heard it this time.

Frowning he leans forward in his chair, squinting into the darkness to make out the blond hair peeking out from underneath the large blankets. Jim's starting to toss and turn, rustling the sheets. Leonard contemplates getting up and waking Jim, but perhaps the blond will sink back down into peacefulness.

But, that is not the case.

With each passing moment, his captain becomes more exasperated in his mumblings. Jim's hands begin to reach for imaginary things, but Leonard decides to give him something real to hold onto.

Getting up, he sits upon the edge of the bed, taking Jim's clammy hand and stroking the blond hairs back calmly.

Jim lets a sigh out, and instinctively edges closer to Leonard's warmth.

"Damn puppy." Leonard grumbles softly to himself, gently easing himself beside Jim, to feel his body against his own, to feel Jim's breath blow against his side, to feel Jim's very essence near his.

He stays there, stroking silky golden locks back, admiring his captain's peaceful face, the glow about his cheeks and the hum of his lips.

Leonard's letting his own eyes begin to close, finding comfort within Jim's presence, but his captain's words begin to echo within his mind.

 _"_ _Bones, please. I-I, I don't want to die alone."_

"It's alright, I won't let you die alone Jim." Leonard breathes, drawing Jim closer in effort to emphasize that fact.

As the time begins to slip by once more, Leonard finds himself finally sinking under, when Jim groans, shifting onto his stomach and his outstretched hand lands squarely onto the doctor's face. Leonard can only assume his captain had been searching for the plush pillow, and not his inconvenient face, but it's too late for that now, for Jim's finger's begins to curl, some of them pulling onto Leonard's lower lip.

"Damn it Jim."

Leonard pulls the hand from his mouth causing Jim to moan a complaint and lazily open his blue eyes. Immediately Leonard sees the universe within them, each star, planet, nebula, and galaxy, it's all in there, in those ocean blue orbs. The blond even dares a sheepish smile.

"Bones, what are you doin' here?" Jim asks softly, adjusting himself so he can sit more upright.

Leonard shrugs at first. He himself isn't entirely certain. Yeah, he had an awful dream about Jim dying, but he didn't have to stay here.

"Did you have a nightmare again?"

He swallows. Jim sounded like a parent asking their child if they had a bad dream. Yet, he finds himself obediently nodding, uncertain if he can trust his own damn voice.

Jim hums, rubbing his tired eyes briefly, "I assumed so, the past few days you've looked worn out. Also Spock said he's found you several times roaming the halls during Gamma shift."

"The damn hob goblin should be asleep as well." Leonard whines, glancing away from Jim's caring eyes.

His captain smirks and laughs lightly, "He's a vulcan, he probably doesn't need as much rest to refuel like us."

"Yeah, as far as we know."

Jim huffs, examining his hand, which had fallen into Leonard's mouth mere seconds before.

Leonard decides to let Jim be confused. No need to embarrass the kid, it's already bad enough he's got to wake up to him in his bed.

Simply wiping his hand on the sheet none too discreetly, Jim glances up, meeting his eyes, "Want to talk about it?"

Leonard lets his mind be tugged back to the nightmare.

 _He's standing the forest once more, staring down at Jim's fading eyes. The blood is seeping into his shoes, yet Jim seems content on shooting him a dashing smile, lying disfigured against the tree, teeth stained red._

 _He swallows, crouching down._

 _"_ _Bones, I seemed to have gotten myself into trouble again." Jim coughs hoarsely, body shuddering with the effort._

 _"_ _Shh, Jim don't move, you're only gonna make it worse. Hold still."_

 _Jim's sick laughter fills his ears, "I'm already gone Bones, just let me die in peace."_

"Hey, Bones. You-who! I'm right here." Jim snaps a finger in his face, causing his gaze to snap from the floor to meet the brimming sky, "Hi there. Guess I lost you. Am I too boring for you?"

"No…no sorry Jim, it's just…" Leonard rubs his face with a hand, feeling Jim's gaze penetrate his skull, "Just, what?" Jim prompts innocently, trying one of those childish smiles, as if he were almost ashamed of himself for asking.

"Just, don't die, okay? Just promise me you won't die."

Jim laughs. Actually, he laughs a little too hard.

Leonard hears the stress in each chuckle. It's almost to the point of being forced, or it's out of such uncertainness the blond can't help but laugh nervously.

He gives his captain a moment to compose himself, "Bones, you know I can't promise that."

"I know, but maybe just for today. Promise me you won't die today." Leonard looks into his captain's eyes, pleading through them.

Jim sighs, seeing no point in arguing, "I promise I won't die today."

His captain says it confidently, but they both know, during given certain circumstances, it won't stop Jim from sacrificing himself. But for the sake of the moment they allow themselves that time to believe in the promise, it provides comfort, a safety blanket.

"Feel better?" Jim smiles, leaning back, head resting up against his shoulder, "Yeah, I think so." Leonard replies, both their gazes traveling across the room.

"Now you have to promise me something." Jim decides firmly.

Leonard hums, "What?"

"Promise me you won't die."

He half laughs, shaking his head, "You know I can't do that either."

"Alright, then maybe. Just, promise me that today you won't die?"

Leonard wraps his arm around his captain's shoulders, giving his arm a reassuring squeeze, "I promise I won't die today."

Jim smirks, satisfied with the answer.

They then let themselves be consumed by the sweet pleasure of blackness. Where their worries, anxieties, and issues melt away. Where their responsibilities disappear and their minds are allowed to relax and forget the unforgettable. Where the evils of the day slither away for the night and only attack through dreams. Where they can finally accept their own fate and live with it.

Where they're both able to believe in that promise. To not die today.

But then, the alarm rings for Jim's Alpha shift, and suddenly, their world comes crashing back down at their feet.

That promise isn't so believable anymore.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sit and Watch**

 **(Yeah, I'm hitting a hard writer's block, so chapter 3 here we are! Because when I can't write "I'll Be Good", I'll be writing this lol)**

It became a daily thing for them. They meet at the turbolift each morning just to whisper their sacred promise, to not die that die, but it was only a matter of time when one of them tested that promise. To test the boundaries of that promise, to push the limits and stretch the mark.

Only, it's not the person one would think that does it, no, it's Leonard McCoy that finds himself kicking that promise to the dirt, and he always thought it'd be Jim.

Like every other mission under Jim's captaincy, their away mission was supposed to be a peaceful and yet adventurous one, full of exotic plant and insect life, but it never goes that way. And that explains the away team, consisting of Leonard himself, Sulu, Chekov, and Jim, who just couldn't pass the opportunity to go with Leonard.

Now, when Spock had said "abnormal insect life", Leonard assumed maybe some six inch cockroaches and plate-sized spiders, and that is why he carries anti-venom serum in his medkit, but no, that's not at all as it turns out.

Try a man-sized human-eating beetle, with teeth like a Great White shark and claws like a Kodiak bear.

And despite the norms, it's not his idiot blond captain that runs head first into the massive hibernating monster, its Sulu, who was too busy staring down at his tricorder readings to notice until it growled and swiped a giant claw his way.

The Enterprise pilot barely managed to dodge it and run away before he collides straight into Leonard, who as well was busy, well, busy being dead tired on his feet that is.

"Holy shit!" He yelps as he sees the insect trample its way over to them, teeth bared.

"C'mon!" Sulu snatches his arm and pulls him sprinting through the forest, shouting out to the rest of the away team.

Suddenly there's laser fire to their right, Jim has Chekov searching for a signal to the Enterprise, while he has his phaser trained on the beetle.

"Bones!"

He hears his captain's shout, but Sulu's tight grip has him running past and further into the jungle, the bug rampaging after them, not bothering for the far more valuable ship captain, though it is an insect and probably just has its sights set on the pair.

Unfortunately, just like any iconic chase scene from those old twenty-first century movies, the two come skidding to halt in front of a sheer drop off, and that's no water beneath, just jagged rocks.

There are two options, they can jump, and most certainly die, or one of them can distract the bug before it's too late. Of course, he'd much rather the latter of the two, but seeing the terror etched onto Sulu's face, and the fact Jim still trails twenty yards behind the beast, that only leaves him to the action.

"You got to be kidding me." Leonard grumbles, pulling out his phaser and despite Sulu's protests, he runs forward, firing his phaser into the bug's beady little eyes.

The creature releases a high pitched screech when one shot hits its mark.

Leonard's left with ten feet between himself and the beetle.

Goddamn, this is it; this is where he faces his fate.

But he catches Jim eye, and by God he can't let himself die, especially with the blond watching.

Knowing he can't outrun the beast, Leonard makes back for the cliff's edge, the beetle gaining ground. He keeps firing, fueling its rage, causing it to hurtle faster at him.

He reaches the edge, having a few moments to spare until the beetle meets him. Within that split second, he scans the area for Jim, his captain, his best friend. He's there, breathless and sweating, raising a hand to halt Sulu and Chekov who long to rush forward. Jim wants to help, but Leonard knows he won't risk the lives of his shipmates to do so.

Then, he blinks.

The beetle collides into him with full force and they both tumble down the cliff's edge. His vision goes black but he can feel the wind against his face as he falls and if he's screaming he can't tell, he just knows that the moment he meet's the planet's surface, everything becomes completely still.

To be honest, Leonard thought he'd died right there, it isn't until he feels the bursting pain shooting up his entire body he thinks different.

"Son of a bitch…" He moans, blinking blearily up at the darkened sky.

Underneath him lies the beetle, impaled on a rock. Luckily, he landed on top. Unluckily, he feels like he broke several ribs.

"Bones?"

There's a tremble in that voice and it steals Leonard's breath.

Leonard glances to his left, finding Jim standing on top of the beetle, a Starfleet harness secured around his body, a long cable dangling from above.

"Oh god, Bones, I thought you were dead." Jim whispers hoarsely, crashing down beside him to stroke his hair back.

Leonard grasps Jim's shaking hand, squeezing it gently, "It's alright Jimbo, I'm alive. Calm down kid."

Jim nods sternly, blinking any tears that may have been forming away.

"Okay, yeah. You're right. Let's get you out of here."

Right at the moment lightning strikes across the sky, and on que, the rain begins to pour. Jim sighs and rolls his eyes, "Typical." The blond mutters and Leonard smirks, Jim got that from him.

"Think you can stand?" Jim prompts, pulling out another harness to attach it to him, "Um, I don't know…maybe?"

"Alright, we'll take it nice and slow then." Jim replies carefully, crouching beside him and helping him into a sitting position, "Shit." He breathes, his head spinning away as nausea swells in his stomach.

"Okay, just sit there Bones, I got this." His captain tells him gently, moving around to slip the harness through Leonard's legs, "Okay, I'm gonna stand you up to get this on all the way, I want you to hold onto my harness okay?"

Leonard nods, not trusting his own voice at the moment.

"Alright." Jim mutters, grasping him by the armpits and hauling him up.

Leonard hisses out in pain, desperately clinging onto his captain's harness, forehead pressed to his shoulder.

"It's okay Bones," Jim soothes, tugging the harness up and one by one slipping his arms through with such carefulness Leonard didn't know was possible from him.

Jim then takes a moment to secure it tightly on him, buckling straps and clipping their harnesses together.

"Woah, Jim, you don't plan on just waltzing back up that cliff do you?" He questions, watching Jim gives one last tug on his harness to test it, "Uh yes, yes I do."

"What about the Enterprise?" Leonard gasps, gripping Jim's harness as the blond adjusts the clamp on the cable, readying to pull them both up there.

"I sent Sulu and Chekov back, a storm rolled in, blocking communications with the ship. I stayed here to get you. There was no way in hell I was gonna leave you down here, dead or alive." Jim declares sharply, taking a second to look into Leonard's eyes, to convey his feelings towards the man.

Leonard manages a smile, "Well, thank you Captain Kirk, but now we're both stuck on this damn planet."

Jim sighs, "If I didn't come get you, you'd still be lying on your ass right now with no way out."

Jim's got a point. Leonard nods, "Okay, let's do this."

His captain pats him on the shoulder, "It's gonna work, don't worry."

It's jinxed within that moment.

Jim makes the steady climb back up, hauling both of their weight up. Leonard notices all the winces, grunts, and hisses of pain and strain on his muscles. If Jim were any less fit they'd never make it out of here. So thank God for Jim's sleepless nights because that's when he works out the hardest.

If it weren't for the rain, they would've made it without incident, but as they climb the cliff, Jim uses the rocky surface for his feet, aiding his climb, it's risky, but quicker. But the blond slips and there's a split second where they both think they're about to plummet back down to their certain deaths, but Jim reaches out and grabs the cable with his bare hands, grinding his teeth in pain.

Leonard releases the breath he didn't realize he was holding.

"Sorry." Jim wheezes, taking a minute to catch his breath before continuing the climb back up.

He doesn't reply, he's just trying to keep his stomach in.

Jim makes it up to the top without further setbacks. As soon as they make it, Jim detaches himself from the cable, then from Leonard.

Leonard collapses onto the ground, holding his ribs in, how Jim manages around with a broken rib is beyond him. It only takes a moment longer for him to look towards Jim, the blond has lost all color in his skin, and his hands are outstretched before him, shaking with palms towards the sky.

"Jim, what's wrong with your hands?" He asks, unhooking the harness slowly as not to injure himself.

His captain tucks his hands away casually, "Nothing, its fine. Don't worry about it."

More lightning strikes and the rain seems to fall heavier, slicing through the trees like they were nothing.

Jim pads over to him, harness dropping to the ground.

"Where'd you get these anyway?"

Jim smirks, "I had the Enterprise beam down some emergency equipment, we got some blankets, harnesses, matches, and some rations."

Leonard nods, "Good, I still got my medkit on me too."

"Good, looks like we're due for a camping trip."

Leonard raises an eyebrow at his captain, "You call this camping?" He exclaims, glancing around him.

Jim just shakes his head, "C'mon, let's get out of this rain." The blond declares, shoving the harnesses into his backpack and bringing Leonard to his feet.

Leonard huffs, they have a long night ahead of them, and a even longer one if they want to survive.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sit and Watch**

 **(I have not been cured of my writer's block unfortunately. So, chapter 4, here we are)**

"Would you please sit down?"

He keeps pacing.

"It'll stop raining, just sit."

He tears at his hair.

"There's nothing you can do about it right now."

He sighs and glances away.

"It won't hurt to sit down, eat a little?"

He shrugs the suggestion off, shoulders tense.

"Jim please."

His captain finally turns to face him, a smile trying to curve onto his lips, but failing.

They've been hiding out in this cave for the past six hours, and the rain hasn't even lightened up since, it seems only to come down harder. But during that time span, Jim has managed to gather some firewood and actually get a fire going, where he found the dry wood is still a mystery, but it did take him almost two hours. And now, Jim stands by the cave's entrance, stripped of his golden uniform, which now is tugged snuggly onto Leonard's own body on Jim's assistance.

The blond had patched him up very carefully, following every instruction to the tee. But, Leonard was cold and beginning to shiver, so Jim shed some of his own clothes for him, also giving him both of the blankets and declaring stubbornly that he wasn't cold. His captain so far has refused to eat any of the rations and hasn't so much as stood a foot near the fire since it's started.

Even now Leonard can begin to see the tremors shoot up Jim's spine and spot the pale complexion and blue lips. Jim's only going to get colder at this rate.

"The storm will thin out and then we'll be able to hail the Enterprise." Leonard continues, and Jim nods slowly, coming to sit beside him.

Leonard offers him a smile and leans over to drape one of the blankets about his shoulders.

"Bones please, I'm good." Jim begins to take the warmth from his shoulders, but Leonard places a stern hand on his back, "Don't even think about it, you're cold too."

The look in Leonard's eyes is enough to stop him from arguing further.

"And while you're here, lemme take a look at those hands."

Jim doesn't meet his gaze, but nonetheless let's Leonard take a hold of his shaking hands, moving them gently.

Leonard uses the firelight to see the deep rope burns across Jim's palms. He traces the surface casually, and Jim fidgets in his spot, wincing only slightly, still not daring to lift his eyes from the floor.

Pulling out his medkit, Leonard pours some disinfectant into the burns and it's then Jim makes an audible gasp, ending with him clamping his mouth shut. Leonard gives him a sympathetic smile and continues to wrap his captain's hands in a bandage, making sure it's secure before dropping Jim's hands back into his lap.

"We should rest." Leonard decides after a moment.

Jim nods, bringing the backpack over and letting Leonard use it as a pillow. The blond then situates himself opposite of Leonard, so he can only see his captain's face through the flickering flames.

"Are you going to sleep Jim?"

"Yeah, yeah I'll be right after you, go ahead Bones."

It's a lie, Jim doesn't sleep easily in new places and they both know it. But nonetheless Leonard nods his head wearily and accepts the answer, because by god he's tired.

He drifts quickly to sleep, his mind fading to black.

Leonard enjoys it, until he's disturbed by the sound of thunder rolling across the sky. Though, it is no Earth storm, the thunder his high pitched and practically deafening once it hits his ears.

He bolts up, finding himself in a tangle of blankets.

Damn it, Jim didn't keep his.

He glances about, finding the cave empty, no blond.

"You idiot." He breathes, shaking his head. Of course Jim would leave, but where to? Who the hell knows, Leonard's too pissed to think of an answer.

The fire's still crackling so Jim couldn't have left too long ago, or the fire would've died by now.

Leonard keeps his gaze to the cave opening, waiting for Jim to appear through the rain. Seconds turn into minutes and soon enough twenty minutes have passed with no Jim. The kid has to be soaked by now.

Growling, Leonard plants his feet onto the ground, he has to search for him, he can't stay here. Jim's probably hurt knowing his dumb luck.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Leonard's eyes snap up, finding Jim's piercing eyes gazing directly at him. The blond is drenched, water trickling and dripping off of him, as if he just jumped into a pool and got out. His breath fogs before him and Leonard would be damned if he missed the shivers rattling his captain's limbs.

"Damn it Jim, you shouldn't be out there. It's freezing!"

Jim just nods, "Yeah sorry, I was just scouting out to see how big the storm is."

"I'm sure it'll pass Jim, we can wait it out."

The blond goes to smile, but it falters, "Yeah, it'll pass." His tone is lifeless and dry.

"Jim…it'll pass?"

His captain chews his lower lip, a nervous habit Leonard has grown to notice, "It's been eighteen hours, and the storm still stretches on for miles."

"Shit."

Jim huffs a laugh, "Yeah, shit."

"It'll be fine, we just ration our rations and hold out for as long as we can. I doubt this storm will last a full day." Leonard says hopefully, but he sees Jim drop his gaze, obviously thinking different.

"Are you hungry?" Jim comes over, stirring the fire and giving Leonard a glance.

"Nah, I'm good."

The blond nods, letting his eyes be absorbed by the licking flames.

"Have you eaten Jim?"

"Yeah, I ate while you were asleep."

Another lie.

Leonard sighs, resting back down, eyes already drooping.

"Just sleep Bones."

So he does. He lets his mind be swept away again in sweet bliss of blackness.

And this time it's not thunder that draws him back to the land of the living, no, it's the burning in his insides. He feels like he's on fire, and for just a moment, he thinks Jim let him catch on fire.

"Hey Bones, its okay."

The voice sounds awkward, it's not used to comforting.

"Bones, you're getting a fever, c'mon, wake up."

Leonard forces his eyes open, finding Jim bending over him, a worried look in his eyes.

The blond smiles, "Morning Bonesy."

"Morning?" He rasps out, and Jim quickly snatches him a bottle of water, "Yeah, you've been out all night." Jim replies, helping him into a sitting position so he can drink some of the water.

"Thanks." He mutters after he's cleared his throat, "God, I feel like crap." Leonard groans, shifting himself up against the cave wall.

Jim gives him a half smirk, "Yeah don't worry, some food will make you feel better."

The blond hands him the food ration, a protein bar for now.

"Did you eat?" Leonard asks, taking into note the bags beneath the kid's eyes, the slight tremble in his hands, and the pale complexion.

"Yeah, just before you woke up."

Leonard is unable to look at Jim as he lies, instead, gazing out towards the opening, watching the rain fall steadily from dark clouds.

"The fire's about to die and we're gonna need some more water here pretty soon, so I think I'll head out in a couple of hours." Jim decides, and he's more of talking to himself than Leonard.

He rubs a hand over his face, feeling the tingling burn in his forehead, "There's a hypo in my bag, should get rid of whatever infection I'm getting and clear up this nasty fever."

"Okay." Jim digs out his medkit, handing it over so Leonard can pull out the correct hypo, "Here, jam this into my neck." He gives Jim the hypo.

The blond glares at the hypo as if it has wronged him, "You want me to stick this piece of shit into your neck?" Jim exclaims in horror.

"Jim, it won't hurt you, hell it's probably gonna hurt more for me since you never do this."

Jim glares at the instrument, still not making a move for Leonard's neck, "C'mon kid, do I gotta do this myself?"

"No, no I got this." Jim shakes his head, and then his face hardens into something of concentration as he readies the hypo against Leonard's skin.

His captain hesitates though, hand shaking, so Leonard reaches over, gripping Jim's wrist with reassurance, giving him the strength to inject it into his neck. Immediately afterwards Jim discards the object, letting it roll away into the dark cervices of the cave.

Jim sighs, running a bandaged hand through his hair.

Leonard takes the moment to assess himself, feeling the hypo kick into his bloodstream, the relief is almost instantaneous.

"Here, you're probably tired." Jim murmurs, coming over to help Leonard lie back down, blankets piling back on top.

"Jim." He calls out, snatching his captain's wrist, "Please, take a blanket, kid you look cold."

"I'm good Bones, really. It's just the fever talking. Go back to sleep, hopefully I'll be able to find some dry wood for the fire."

Leonard nods, knowing that he's already lost the battle. If Jim were the one injured, it'd be easier to take care of him, but Leonard hurt? Well that's a different story. Jim is practically pampering him, though Leonard will admit he probably can't stand right now, not with his damaged ribs. The blond more than likely has a high pain tolerance, but that doesn't explain his resilience to the bitter cold weather of this damn planet.

Slowly he fades, waking several hours to a warm crackling fire, a bottle of water and some food rations beside him. Jim seems to have disappeared again, off into the howling storms.

Leonard groans, sitting upright against the wall. His ribs flare up with each movement, but the hunger is stronger than the pain. He devours it slowly though, not wanting to upset his stomach. Sighing he tugs the backpack out, going through their supplies, most of it is still there.

Jim hasn't eaten.

They've been here for over twenty-four hours.

There's still time of course, but Leonard would rather have him eat sooner rather than later.

Jim enters the cave, soaked to the bone, eyes sunken in, skin still white, but eyes blazing fiery blue.

"Where'd you go?"

"Scouted out the area. There's been few times where those giant bugs come creeping around. I'm just making sure we're not near a nest or something." Jim replies with a shrug, and Leonard can't even tell if the blond is lying or not.

"Well, come sit down and warm up then-and don't tell me you're not cold, I can see your teeth chattering." Leonard growls sternly, making Jim sigh, there's no point in arguing with him.

Obediently Jim sits beside him, pressing up against Leonard's side. Leonard shudders, the kid is like an ice cube.

"Jim, how long have you been outside in the rain?"

"I dunno, an hour or two."

"Shit, kid. You don't know what disease you'll catch out there!"

Jim frowns at him, "I'm fine Bones, really."

"Kid, if your teeth chatter any harder they're gonna break. C'mon, take the clothes off." Leonard insists, shrugging off the blankets and sitting in front of Jim, wincing from the movement.

The blond scowls, "Bones, it's fine, I'll sit by the fire-" Jim's interrupted by his own wet cough, not able to stop the shivers from rattling his limbs. Leonard gives him a glare, "Okay, I do admit, I'm kinda cold Bones." Jim says with a sigh.

"Alright, we'll get those clothes off, then you can wrap up in these blankets."

Jim just nods and begins to tug at his black undershirt, but the stretchy fabric is clinging to his skin. Leonard shakes his head and grabs the hems of the shirt, pulling up over the blond's head to reveal toned muscles.

Leonard is mesmerized for a second, until he hears Jim kicking off his boots, then he's back to helping Jim peel off the rest of his clothes until he's down to his boxers. By then Jim's shaking, arms wrapped around his legs to keep them from trembling.

"Alright, come here kid, let's get you warmed up." Leonard scoots back up against the wall, bringing Jim to his side.

The kid fits snugly against him, using the backpack for support. Leonard has one blanket beneath them and the other draped across their bodies. Jim coughs again, a tremor shooting up his body, so he comes closer to Leonard, stealing all of his feverish heat. Though Leonard's not complaining

They drift off to sleep together, keeping each other balanced and safe.

It's not until he hears a low rumbling growl and feels Jim's hands shaking him awake does the comfort disappear.

"Jim…?" He murmurs drowsily, blinking his eyes to life.

Jim breathes a whisper, "We have to leave, we have to leave now."


	5. Chapter 5

**Sit and Watch**

Leonard sits back rather quietly, watching Jim stuff the rest of their belongings into the backpack and then putting out the fire.

"Jim-"

"Keep your voice down." Jim hisses back, slinging the bag over his shoulder, clothes still damp against his skin.

"Jim, where are we going to go?"

The blond sighs, coming beside Leonard, "I've scouted the area out, there's another cave just two miles from here. Away from-well, whatever is out there."

Just on que the creature releases a screech, startling both the Starfleet officers.

"Shit, okay let's go before this thing decides it's hungry."

Jim nods his agreement, getting to his feet and turning to help Leonard up as well. Leonard makes it up with a grunt, clutching his side.

"Alright, here goes nothing." Jim mumbles under his breath, steering the pair towards the entrance, peeking out briefly to see if the giant creature is nearby.

"What is even out there?"

"I dunno, it has like eight legs, hard shell, and fangs." Jim replies, adjusting Leonard within his grip, "You just described every living thing here."

Jim shrugs his shoulders and guides Leonard around the backside of the cave, taking to the steep incline. Large trees tower above them, yet they provide no shelter from the pelting rain. The storm rages in the sky, and lightning begins to crackle up in the clouds, thunder grumbling after it.

Leonard sets the pace for the most part. Jim, despite Leonard's attempts, takes most of his weight with one arm around his waist and the other keeping Leonard's arm slung about his shoulders. Leonard's still wearing his own clothes, along with Jim's golden uniform over everything. It's a tight fit, considering the fact Jim's already leaner than him, but nonetheless it keeps him nice and warm despite the slicing winds and chilling rainfall.

The blond on the other hand is left exposed to each draft and each droplet, but he doesn't let it show on his face.

They keep hiking up, the pace slowing, so Jim just keeps taking more and more of Leonard's weight. It's already difficult enough, but of course, their luck has to run dry.

A screech has them picking up into a jumbled run, neither of them wasting a moment to glance behind themselves to see just how close the thing is to them. They race to the top and begin the steep decline.

Leonard can feel his ribs begin to fire up, his breath becoming restricted with each passing moment. His vision begins to spin and soon he's simply clutching onto his captain, hoping the blond won't run him into a tree.

Suddenly, he's pushed off course, crashing into a large puddle of mud. He gasps and looks up desperately for Jim. His moron of a captain is still sprinting, obviously he had shoved Leonard off to the side and kept going with the large scorpion like creature right behind him.

"You got to be kidding me." Leonard growls, bringing himself up slowly. Of course he has to go after Jim, the blond moron is more than likely going to get eaten if he doesn't do anything.

Forcing his legs forward, Leonard half stumbles half jogs down the hill, hoping to catch up with Jim and the creature, but in his weakened state, he's losing sight of them both. He follows them down and towards a large clearing with an overflowing river running through it.

Jim has slowed down his retreat, now taking small steps towards the gushing waters, the alien bug now having him cornered. There's only one way out for Jim, and that's to jump into the water.

Leonard scans the river, the dark waters are moving hastily with the constant fall of rain. Jim will be swept under if he dives in. The idiot will drown.

"Jim!" He shouts, seeing the contemplation written all over his captain's face. Jim looks his way briefly, eyes full of regret, or maybe fear.

The blond then taunts the creature closer and closer to the water, and when the bug lunges to grab him he jumps into the river with it following. Jim and the bug are swept away within seconds, disappearing with the thickening rain and dark waters.

Leonard swallows, still unsure of what he just saw.

This is what Jim felt like when he fell down the cliff. This sheer utter panic and anxiety riveting in his chest is exactly what Jim felt.

"Shit…" He breathes, running a hand through his hair. He has to find Jim, and he has to find him quickly. The blond has already been developing side effects from the bitter cold and from being constantly wet. Leonard can't imagine what a dunk into the freezing river will do for him.

Leonard does his best to keep a steady pace along the river's shore, but with no trees above, the full force of the storm is wearing him down, and his ribs feel like they're about to slice through his lungs.

His breathing only becomes more ragged with time as he hurriedly scurries down the riverside, keeping his eyes open for blond hair.

It takes him over an hour just to find the dead washed up bug, but there's no sign of Jim nearby, so he continues his trek down. At this point he can no longer feel the cold; he's just running because he's numb and tingling all over with the last reserves of adrenaline.

Adrenaline. He has an adrenaline shot in his medkit.

Shakily he goes through, finding the correct hypo before punching it into his skin, injecting the liquid into his body.

The rush that hits him is amazing and keeps him on his feet for the next hour.

He's on the verge of utter collapse when that name is spoken hoarsely from the riverbank. It tears his heart and snaps his mind into doctor mode.

"B-Bones…" Jim calls weakly, barely a foot from the lapping waters, huddled in a tight ball, shivering violently.

Leonard sighs in relief and crashes beside his captain, assessing the damage.

"Talk to me kid." Leonard brings him onto his back, peeling up his shirt to examine his ribs.

"B-Bones, I-I can't stop." Jim whimpers pathetically, teeth chattering, "Can't stop what?"

"Shaking-I can't stop shaking."

The kid's right, he's a shivering mess with his clothes soaked with the icy river water. If Leonard doesn't get the kid warmed up soon, he's going to be facing possible pneumonia or even hypothermia at this point.

"Okay, umm. Okay I'm gonna help you stand up, think you can do that?"

Jim nods, determination gleaming in his blue eyes. That's good; the kid hasn't given up just yet.

"Alright, on three," Leonard crouches beside Jim, grabbing him from the armpits, "one, two, three." He heaves Jim up and the blond nearly crumples back over, but Leonard keeps him upright with a sharp pain in his ribs.

Jim is completely stiff, barely able to move his legs forward.

Leonard tightens his grip, holding Jim by his bicep with one hand and the other around his waist, guiding him gently towards the trees, but the protection from the weather is nonexistent.

"Where…" Jim trails off, finding his breath wheezy, "Shelter, we need to find shelter." Leonard supplies, catching Jim when he stumbles over his own numb feet.

The blond nods into his shoulder, body still quivering.

"Don't worry, I'll get you warmed up."

They walk together, both desperately trying to keep the other from falling, but between Leonard's burning ribs and Jim's rigid movements, they won't make it very far. They have no food or blankets, since Jim lost the backpack in the river, all they have left is the clothes on their backs and Leonard's medkit.

The best shelter they find is a low overhang with tree roots dangling down, searching for the solid ground below. It doesn't provide much protection from the winds, but at least the rain is no longer pelting against their faces.

Wordlessly, Leonard begins to undress Jim, without his permission. But the blond is rather compliant, but he's also losing consciousness. Leonard pulls off his shirt and tugs off his boots and pants, discarding the wet clothes to the side.

Leonard himself is pretty soaked, but with Jim's and his own uniform on, the rain hasn't soaked through all the layers.

With Jim in nothing but his boxers, Leonard pulls off the two shirts, tossing Jim's golden one to the side to dry and brings the dry blue shirt over Jim's head. The blond snaps awake at the movement and allows Leonard to guide his arms through the sleeves. It's probably the first time Jim's worn dry clothes since it has started raining.

Leonard's medical shirt is large and baggy on Jim's body, the sleeves running well past his knuckles and the hem of the shirt drooping past his waist. Nonetheless, Jim cuddles up in the shirt, accepting the warmth it provides.

Taking off his own boots, Leonard proceeds to pull off his pants, finding them cold and damp against his skin. Leonard takes a moment to examine Jim, checking his skull for bumps or cuts and then the rest of his appendages that all seem to be intact. Overall the blond seems to be okay, other than the rapidly decreasing temperature and wheezing breath. The kid probably has fluid in his lungs from swallowing the water.

"Alright come here Jim."

Jim gives him one of those small, almost vulnerable, smiles that he's seen only a few times in his entire life.

"That's it." Leonard gives the kid a cordial squeeze, welcoming the shivering body beside him.

The blond doesn't say anything, just letting Leonard take control of things for now. Jim isn't used to caring for Leonard, it's like he almost doesn't know how. But he does, Jim does know how. Because of Tarsus. The kid's probably having flashbacks. Shit.

Leonard makes a mental note to watch for signs of mental breakdown in his friend.

Jim's told him some of the stories. The bits and pieces about taking care of his "kids". This is somewhat similar, with Jim taking care of him.

Leonard sighs, stroking Jim's hair gently, as not to stir Jim from his doze and not to ignite any pain in his own ribs.

The rain keeps falling. The wind keeps blowing. The trees keep rattling. The lightning keeps striking.

Leonard concludes that they're seriously screwed.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sit and Watch**

 **(Haha, so it hit me…again. Happy? The next chapter in "My Writer's Block is Breaking my Brain" series. So let's have a little fun with our favorite boys yeah?…Man I'm pretty sure this story was meant to be a oneshot.)**

After last night, it surprises Leonard that he wakes to the sound of clothes jostling in the wind and the soft pattering of rain falling against the leaves, instead of waking to a certain rambunctious captain.

Speaking of which, as Leonard manages to prop himself up on his elbows, is nowhere in sight.

The clothes are strewn across the roots, drying in the wind, but the rain is still falling. The sky remains dark with heavy clouds and temperature is still chilling.

Leonard groans, clasping a hand to his injured ribs and scanning the immediate area for Jim. The idiot must've ran off while he was still sleeping. He tests the clothes, finding them quite dry, so he proceeds to pull on his pants and boots, slipping on Jim's golden uniform since the blond still has his. Leonard then realizes the moron didn't put on his pants; they're still there, flapping in the wind.

Great, now the captain is walking around in nothing but Leonard's medical shirt and a pair of boxers.

Then, as if on que, there's the idiot now, stumbling along, pale as death. Jim at the very least had the brains to tie on his boots before leaving, but his legs have to be numb. And Leonard can't help but smirk at the fact that his own shirt is so big on Jim that the kid's boxers are barely noticeable underneath.

"Where have you been?" Leonard calls out, and Jim visibly startles as he comes closer, "Bones, we're so screwed."

"What? What are ya talking about?"

Jim rubs a hand over his face, standing just outside the overhang, raining beating down onto him, "We're in a valley Bones. We're in a damn valley."

Leonard frowns, "So…?"

"The storm is caught in the stupid mountains."

"Oh." Leonard sighs, they are screwed.

The blond groans, glancing up at the sky, "By the looks of it, the storm is coming down here over the mountains to the east, and is just sitting right over us. Now we can try to wait it out, but it can rain for days and we ain't got the type of time."

"What's the second option?" Leonard prompts, already dreading the answer, "We follow the river upstream to the northern mountains and climb over that."

"Damn it. It's never easy is it?"

Jim doesn't answer, just keeps gazing up.

"Hey dummy, come over here and warm up." Leonard orders, and Jim complies with a sheepish grin.

Jim crouches down to get under the overhang, and Leonard sees his knees nearly buckle with the effort. The kid needs to rest up too.

"How long were you gone?"

"Only an hour."

The answer is too easy and innocent to be true.

"Right." Leonard grumbles and Jim doesn't bother commenting.

Jim carefully pulls on his pants, hands trembling as he's barely able to yank them onto his waist.

Leonard glares at him skeptically, "Lemme see your hands kid."

The blond obliges, and Leonard takes them into his own, unraveling the now worn bandages, "Shit kid." Leonard gasps out, examining the growing infection, "Jim, this isn't good."

"Nothing's ever good around here." Jim retorts with a huff, "No Jim, I mean, you might not feel it now, but it's gonna start hurting pretty soon." Leonard says, rewrapping the blond's swelling palms.

Jim shrugs carelessly, "It's alright, we'll be hiking over those freezing mountains, you won't feel much up there."

"Jim are you sure that we should go up there? We have no supplies."

"Exactly why we should go, we should leave while we still can." The blond insists sternly.

"We should wait it out, we should wait for the Enterprise, they'll get to us Jim, they always do."

Jim meets his eyes, his blue eyes worn but icy, "If we wait any longer we're going to freeze to death-and we can only go a couple more days without food. Maybe if head towards the mountains we'll find something edible."

"Well, how about water?"

The blond huffs, "The river water is clean enough."

"Yeah you can say that when you begin to puke your guts out." Leonard replies with a snap.

"It's better than nothing." Jim mutters dryly.

Silence befalls the two, consuming them and leaving them to their thoughts. Jim shifts away, just out of Leonard's reach. He huddles into himself, arms around legs, chin on knees. Leonard supposes Jim barely looks a day older than eighteen in that moment, with a glint of fear in his eyes, but his expression hard as he processes the information. It doesn't help when he's still bundled in Leonard's shirt, a size too big for him.

Leonard sighs, running his hands over his legs in hopes of warming them up.

He can feel the hunger in the pit of his stomach building, and he can't imagine what Jim must feel like. The blond naturally eats almost twice as much as Leonard, and lately, Jim's been the one to burn all the calories.

Just how does Jim expect to climb over those damn mountains? With no food, barely any clothes, and only a river to lead them, how are they going to make it? It's an impossible feat on its own, let alone with all the damn rain that's thundering over their head. And literally now, as lightning begins to flash and the thunder crackles overhead.

Jim startles with the first strike, eyes flying open and breath escaping him.

Leonard swallows slowly. If there were rewards for irrational fears, Leonard always assumed it'd go to himself, but after meeting Jim, he found out back in the Academy days the blond had an uncanny fear of lightning storms, so now that reward would go to him. Of course now that Jim works in space, he's gotten over the most of it, and also because one of the fleets strict rules are to break every officer of their phobias.

Though Jim doesn't consider it a phobia, rather it more of memory trigger that he claims that he's learned to block. But right now, with the blond cold, wet, and vulnerable, Leonard can see the anguish in his eyes, and the way he now squeezes his eyes shut in hopes of blocking the images out.

"Hey, talk to me Jimbo." Leonard pries gently, slowly scooting over, minding his own throbbing rib against his side.

Jim hisses with the next strike, flinching involuntarily, "I can handle it." His captain replies, pushing the heels of his hands into his temples.

Leonard sighs, grasping Jim's shoulder, "Lemme help, just one more time before we go?"

Jim glances up, blue eyes peeking through matted blond strands of hair dangling over his forehead. He smiles down, wrapping his arm about the kid's shoulders, feeling the smaller body vibrate with shivers. But Jim gives in, letting himself relax against Leonard's side.

"There you go, just think of the Enterprise kid," Leonard coos, thumb stroking Jim's bicep, "Think about when we get home, it'll be nice and warm, there'll be plenty of food. Hell, I might let you finally eat some of that damn cake those replicators serve."

Lightning flashes and the thunder booms right over them.

Jim nearly explodes off of his chest, but Leonard luckily is able to wrap his arms around the kid's chest and pin him there.

"Woah-calm down-it's just passing right now."

His captain whimpers against his chest, moving just enough to ease the pain in Leonard's ribs so he can breathe.

"Just breathe-it's just pass-"

It strikes again, surprising both the Starfleet officers. They share a look and now they hold onto each other for the sake of comforting both of them.

Leonard's not sure how long the lightning and thunder stays overhead, but by the time it stops, Jim's out like a light against his side, only upright because Leonard clings onto him. Stiffly, Leonard eases his captain onto his lap, stretching his arms out afterwards.

Once Jim wakes he's certain the kid is going to want to head out there, but he's just not sure if they're actually going to make it.

He glances down, taking Jim's hands and unraveling them once again. They're still red and puffy, the cuts themselves taking a yellowish tone with pus. Leonard concludes that he'll have to push the pus out eventually for further healing.

Jim's not going to like that.

The blond stirs in his sleep as Leonard wraps his infected hands back up, making sure to manage them with care. It can't be pleasant; it has to hurt like a bitch. Jim's just too stubborn to admit it. Damn brat.

"Bones…?" Jim drowsily murmurs, glancing up, eyes widening as he awakens.

Leonard manages a weak smile, "Hey Jim."

Jim pushes himself up with fists, yawning and rubbing his eyes. The fog in his blue eyes clear and he seems to be more awake than he has in days.

"Ready to go?" He prompts casually, standing and stretching his legs out.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

His captain smiles and helps him to his feet with a noticeable gasp at the pain in his hands.

"Jim?"

"It's fine. It'll be fine." Jim waves him off.

"Okay." Leonard agrees for the sake of agreeing.

Jim nods, "Alright, let's follow the river."

Their trek to the riverside is painfully slow. Jim's still experiencing the chills from the jump into the river and Leonard can't help but think he's probably picked up a bug from doing so. Leonard himself is actually quite warm, or it could be the fever talking and his pain numbed brain from his aching ribs.

"So, we just follow this upstream and hope that we make it over those mountains?" Leonard grumbles over the sound of pattering rain.

Jim flashes a grin his way, "Yup."

"And you don't see how any of this could go wrong? Jim we're probably gonna get eaten by some giant alien bug or catch some deadly disease that makes you rot from the inside out and you'll have maggots crawling out of your eye sockets because your eyeballs fell out."

Jim groans, "You definitely didn't fail English class. Your imagery must've been on point."

Leonard snorts, "Jim there's a reason why I'm a doctor and not an English professor."

"Truth." Jim replies, pausing slightly, raising his hand to silence Leonard.

He watches Jim scan the clearing, eyeing the riverbank, "What?" Leonard pries but Jim hushes him.

They stand there for another minute, "Jim, there's nothing out there, let's go." Leonard urges and Jim nods slowly, "Yeah, okay. Sorry…yeah you're right let's go."

Leonard eyes him suspiciously, but nonetheless follows him along to the rocky shore, underneath the beating rains, though the wind has died down since the thunderstorm passed. But that surely doesn't put him in a better mood.

Distracting his mind, Leonard focuses his attention on Jim, rather than their situation. He watches the kid eye the immediate area wearily, obviously experiencing some form of paranoia. The kid's hands dangle limply by his sides, fingers not even close to clenched-the way he usually carries them when he's tensed which he clearly is now, with his tight shoulders and board-straight back, which means he either can't feel his hands or they hurt too badly to fist. Then, his feet drag across the ground, so he's tired, more tired than he'd like to admit and the way his knees wobble means he's slightly weak-or dizzy, in both cases it's probably from the malnourishment.

But Leonard isn't too much better himself. The pain in his side is constant, flaring with each stumble. His breathing is okay and his vision only wavers if he turns his head too much. There's a slight ache in his legs from the cold, but other than that, he's still functioning and alive, thanks to Jim of course. The kid has sacrificed a lot of things to keep him healthy.

"Let's get a quick drink." Jim suddenly suggests, nearly startling Leonard, "Yeah-yeah sure."

His captain nods, walking a few feet to his right to come beside the water's edge. Leonard watches as Jim kneels slowly to scoop some water from the river, but ultimately ends up hissing as the icy river water soaks into the makeshift bandages.

"We should probably wash those anyways." Leonard smiles gently, crouching beside him, and reaching out to grab Jim's hands.

Jim allows Leonard to take his hands compliantly.

"Alright, sit still." Leonard commands, unraveling the cloth and discarding them on the ground, "This might sting a little." He announces, casually bringing the kid's hands towards the water's surface, though the closer he gets the more resistance he's met with.

"Sooner the better Jim." Leonard urges and forces his captain's hands into the water.

Leonard closes his eyes briefly (and his ears as Jim releases a string of curses), and then turns Jim's hands over, scrubbing the dirt from them, causing Jim to buck and throw Leonard off.

"Ahh, shit. Bones what the hell?" He snaps, pressing his hands to the blue medical shirt to dry them.

"Jim, I need to clean it out." He demands sharply, showing there's no room for argument on the matter.

But Jim shakes his head stubbornly, "No, it's fine. We keep moving-we don't have time for this."

"Jim-"

"Bones! Drink up. We have a long ways to travel and not enough time." Jim growls, using his 'captain's voice' on Leonard, though it never worked anyways, "Jim, I'm serious, if I don't clean your hands they're going to get a hell of a lot worse than they are now."

"Doctor McCoy! Just drink some damn water-that's an order." His captain shouts and Leonard flinches, swallowing down his pride for moment, feeling so damn small underneath the blond's nearly faltering gaze, "Yes sir." He replies dully, crouching back down and scooping up water with his hands to drink.

When he gets up and dries his hands, his captain is glancing away, off towards the tree line, "Let's go." The blond commands and leads the way once more down the rocky bank of the river.

Leonard trails slowly behind, clutching his throbbing ribs, feeling the right one in particular hurt more than the others. Probably fractured instead of bruised.

Glancing up, he catches Jim's worried face, but the expression fleets away and his captain goes back to staring ahead. Then he sees Jim testing his hands, desperately trying to grip the hems of his shirt that droops down to his mid-thigh, but failing.

Shit. Leonard never wrapped his hands back up.

"Do you think we'll be able to find any food up there?" Leonard asks and Jim doesn't even turn his head to reply, "You mean, will 'I' be able to find any food?-And the answer is, I'm hoping so or we're both screwed."

Leonard clamps his mouth shut, getting the message. Jim doesn't want to talk right now, not after pulling rank like that. Jim's never one to pull rank, especially on Leonard, but today, today is a bad day for the both of them. They're tired, cold, hungry, and scared. And who the hell knows what could possibly be going through the kid's head too. Knowing him, Jim probably has several plans and calculations swarming through right now.

So, instead of getting all flustered, Leonard lets it all out in one simple sigh, and ever so simply, carries on, following his captain, because if he were honest with himself, on a normal day he'd follow his captain to every end of the universe without doubt, but today he doubted.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sit and Watch**

 **(Well, not quite sure why I haven't updated this, but here ya ago, another chapter)**

It only gets colder the higher up they go. Luckily along the way, through Leonard's grumbling haze, Jim managed to find a few mushy berries, which according to the tricorder, were safe to eat. So with that rolling around in his stomach, he and Jim make the impossible climb up the mountains. At first it's just steep hills and bitter cold winds that slice through his clothes, but the higher they get, the worse the weather is above their heads.

"Jim!" He shouts over the roaring wind, rain falling into his eyes.

The blond turns at the sound of his voice, "What!"

"We need to find shelter! My ass is freezing!" Leonard replies and he sees the slight hesitation in Jim's eyes as he glances back up the mountain, clearly wanting to climb it now rather than later. But Leonard is cold, tired, hungry, and sore. Also he can feel that damn fever kicking back in.

"Alright!" Jim agrees, proceeding to glance around for anything, but only muddy hills stretch on and on for miles, "We'll have to keep moving until we find something." His captain says, coming beside him to grip his bicep.

Leonard nods numbly, allowing Jim to pull him along, and without realizing, taking some of his weight over his shoulder.

Together they stumble along, Leonard's arm slung about Jim's thinning shoulders. With each step his vision begins to spin and he can feel the sweat building up on his forehead. Soon the fever is going to have him lying on his ass. The berries jostling around in his empty stomach doesn't help much either. But Jim's grip on his arm only tightens, and the determination shining in his captain's eyes is almost terrifying.

He's blindly stumbling, following numbly along with his leader, his captain, his best friend.

Just how much longer can they stay out here in the freezing rain and harsh winds?

Leonard feels his legs wobble, but the support from Jim surges through his muscles, and his captain takes more of his weight.

His eyes are falling shut, feeling the cold wind rip through his clothes, numbing his extremities. He's not sure if he's walking anymore, maybe they've collapsed, maybe Jim's strength finally gave out.

But peeking through his squinted eyes, he can see his legs walking, trudging alongside Jim's. He looks at the blond's face, noticing Jim's pink cheeks yet paled face. The man's chest is heaving rapidly, but Leonard doesn't hear his breaths, all he can hear is the wind screaming in his ears.

Jim's head turns to face him, "Hang on a little longer Bones!"

Leonard hardly acknowledges him, eyes slipping shut and legs buckling beneath him. His body seems to float away into nothingness.

Then, the rain seemingly eases up and warmth reaches his face, hitting the rest of his body in crackling waves. The sensation comforts him, bringing his mind to ease.

Opening his eyes, fire meets him, sparking and lively.

Leonard groans, pushing himself up, stomach rolling, causing him to puke just to his right. Exhaustion takes over and he slumps back down, breathing heavily into the cramped space. He glances to his left, seeing Jim pressed up against the wall, huddled into himself, shivering violently.

"Jim." He says, but his throat is dry and nothing but a breath escapes him.

He goes to move forward but his vision blackens and next thing he knows, he's lying on the muddy floor.

He feels so helpless, his body raging with fever and fatigue. The malnutrition and dehydration doesn't help either.

"Bones…"

A hand starts to pull on him, but the voice hisses, retracting quickly.

"Bones."

Fists nudge him into alertness.

Leonard moans, blinking quickly, finding Jim hovering over him, the look of worry in his eyes.

"Bones, please."

All he can manage is a whimper and allow Jim to guide his head into his lap. Leonard then closes his eyes, feeling Jim's trembling hands run through his hair, fingertips caressing the sides of his head, lulling him.

"I'm sorry Bones."

Leonard's too tired to reply, simply drifting away into fevered dreams.

He wakes only an hour later, puking up whatever the hell is in his stomach, with Jim frantically rushing over to him, pushing him onto his side.

He gags, breath wheezing through his lips.

"Its okay, breathe Bones, breathe."

He feels Jim's arms loop around his waist, pulling him upright and against his captain's chest.

Lazily his head rolls to the side, hearing Jim's pounding heart.

"You're okay Bones." Jim's voice whispers into the dark, the embers of the fire dying out, letting the cold draft seep into their small space.

Leonard closes his eyes, falling back into darkness.

The next time his eyes open, it's to the flash of lightning and graying skies.

He groans, pushing himself up, fever burning in his eyes. His whole body aches and shakes, sweat dripping down his face making him feel sticky.

Heat is lapping at his legs, and glancing over he sees the fire, blazing softly in the cave, casting shadows onto the second occupant of the cave.

"Bones."

Jim's voice is hoarse and dry, and the crackling fire light reveals just how frail Leonard's captain has become. Sharp cheekbones, sunken eyes, and baggy clothes.

Leonard nods, not finding his voice in his throat.

"Here, I have some water." The blond says, snagging out the water bottle and handing it to him.

He takes it gratefully, drinking it down.

His fever has mostly disappeared but the hunger and thirst has pitted deeply within his stomach. Jim doesn't seem to be fairing much better, he's practically turning into a skeleton.

"We're going to have to move soon." Jim mutters, he has that glassy look in his eyes, the one of defeat and exhaustion. Just how long have they been here?

"The storm seems to be slowing down; it's getting caught in the mountains so we got to keep pushing through to the other side." His captain continues, voice gruff and weak.

Leonard just nods, eyes struggling to stay open as his hands stay clasped around the water bottle. Hands. Jim's hands. God his hands.

"Hands." Leonard demands, too depleted to actually form a full sentence.

Jim, seeming to be on the same page, complies without complaint, scooting closer and lifting his arms up to drop his hands into Leonard's.

His captain's hands are heavily infected, pus leaking out, the rope burns taking a yellowish tinge.

"Shit Jim, we need to get this cleaned."

Leonard grabs the medkit, searching through everything, but the best he has is the old fashioned disinfection wipes. That'll hurt like a bitch.

"We gotta clean this out kid…"

Jim's hollow eyes meet his own, blinking blankly, "Okay."

"Okay, c'mere."

Jim understands immediately, coming beside him, pressing his back up against his chest. So Leonard is able to rest his chin on the kid's head, holding the blond's hands in his own. His captain's eyes fall shut, face nudged into his collarbone as if to hide from the upcoming pain.

"I'm ready."

That's an understatement. This is going to hurt so badly.

Leonard pulls out the wipe, taking it gently onto Jim's left hand. He works as carefully and quickly as he can, knowing the longer it takes the longer Jim will be in pain. Nonetheless Jim flinches and squirms beneath him, breathing becoming quick and pulse racing. Whimpers escape and soon the tears are slipping down Jim's face, the kid's whole body trembling with the pain.

"Shh, almost done." Leonard lies, still working on the same hand, forcing the cloth's solution deeper into the infected burns, Jim crying into his chest.

The blond has fastened onto his shirt with a death grip and the silent tears are slipping down his face, his mouth clenched tightly with pain.

"Hold up, its okay, almost done kid." He murmurs, humming gently in hopes of coaxing Jim to breathe.

He stops after the first hand, dropping the wipe to just hold Jim, besides there was no way he was going to be able to pry the kid's other hand from his shirt.

Jim's quivering into him, his breath hitching with each shaky gasp. Tears and snot alike are running down, yet Leonard lets the kid smother his face into his chest. The blond is in so much pain no sound escapes, just the jolts of oxygen that manage to make it to the kid's lungs.

Leonard rubs his back, still humming and beginning to rock back and forth.

Then, carefully, he gets Jim's other hand, pulled across his body awkwardly, yet somehow still comfortable.

"It's alright kid."

He feels the smaller body tense against his own at the contact, almost willing to shrivel and melt into his chest, just to disappear.

By the end, the younger man is just so worn he doesn't even flinch as Leonard dabs his hand a few more times. Maybe Jim has passed out from the pain. It would be for the better. The blond doesn't look like he's slept more than two hours in the past couple days.

But the kid's head lifts from his chest moments later, eyes puffy and red from crying.

"You okay?"

Jim nods shakily, body still trembling.

"Why don't we get some sleep?" He suggests and Jim gives in with a complaint nod, leaning back down into his chest.

Jim's eyes shut quickly and he cradles his hands protectively between the two of them.

When his captain falls asleep, he's following soon after.


End file.
